Oh, hi! You still here? It’s been a while since I’ve done any actual postings, excluding the film ratings updates, which aren’t really new updates. Well, they are, but not original ones. Okay, they are original, I guess, but… See what’s happening here? I’m totally spacing out because of a little, itty-bitty sentence.

This year has been a train wreck when it comes to me writing stuff. In nineteen days, I’ve only written five poems, haven’t written a single short story, and the only prose piece I’ve written was a short chapter of my novel project. Even if you would grant me points for writing five poems, they’re all seethingly depressive and way too long.

Don’t even talk to me about university papers. I was supposed to write a literary essay based upon a formal analysis of a poem and a short story, and even while typing that and thinking about what a formal analysis entails, I’m falling asleep and getting a headache. Today was the deadline and how many words have I got so far? Well, zero, ’cause I never started typing. I’m such an asshole to myself for doing this — yet I couldn’t care less.

It’s not the only deadline I’m missing without caring about it. According to my schedule, I should’ve finished Part I¹ of my novel (yeah, right, dream on), all the episodes in my “Locker Room Chronicles” television concept had to be written down in draft (I guess two are ready, if I look at the script through squinting eyes), and most importantly, I should have made a selection of my poems to send out to magazines (ha!).

So, what am I going to do about it all? I’m going to man up and finish all that before January has ended! And I’m going to slap the bitch around and get my act together to write more posts. What if I don’t? Well… If I don’t, I’ll go to Sunday mass at church throughout the whole month of February.² That’s what I call a serious drive to complete it all before the deadline! Just imagine the look on their faces, just imagine the incredible boredom I would suffer, just imagine the restraint I would have to have to not jump up in the middle of service and scream “What the fuck are you talking about?”! Pffff, I better get to working.